Window into 2023

Getting Going

Publishing the agingartist blog has been gratifying. The more I publish, the more I feel motivated to address new topics.

As I ponder what to do, I stare out the window. My mind seems preoccupied as I contemplate the view. Is this procrastination or something else?

The Creative Process

Beginning a creative process seems chaotic. It starts with questions rather than answers. What am I curious about? What do I want to learn? What is making news in art?

From this cloud of questions come possibilities. How does technology influence art making? Are we oversaturated with imagery? What makes an image meaningful?

How do I turn these fuzzy thoughts into publishable material? That’s my problem.

Deduction and Induction

We use two thought processes, deduction and induction, to solve problems.

We often start with deduction: breaking a problem down into logical parts, then analysing each part for solutions. It’s like taking a motor apart and reassembling it with better components.

Perspiration or Inspiration

Sometimes a problem is unsolvable using deductive methods alone. We can hit a roadblock with no obvious way ahead. We get the urge to get up from the desk and pace around the room, or stare blankly out the window.

I was always puzzled by this urge to stop and take a break. I felt that I needed to think harder and to keep my nose to the grindstone until I cracked the problem. That approach often doesn’t work.

At an impasse we need to rethink the problem and consider unusual ‘outside the box’ possibilities . At this frustration point, we need to switch to inductive thinking.

Amnesia

?????

To digress, consider what happens when we can’t recall a name. Suppose we forget the name of a person we haven’t seen in awhile, or the name of an old movie, book or song. Try as we might, we can’t remember that ##@$# name! When we give up trying and resume other activities, the forgotten name suddenly comes to mind. Ah ha!

Inspiration

Unconscious Mind

Sometimes the unconscious part of me needs to take over the problem. It uses a myriad of circuits and processes that the conscious mind cannot access.

It takes time for the inductive process to digest the information in this unknowable way. That’s when the urge stop and stare out the window strikes. The subconscious mind is telling the deductive mind to go away. In the background while I am preoccupied with other things, my subconscious is fully engaged with the problem. When I am out on a walk, doing household chores, or at 4 am when I can’t sleep, a solution to will present itself, seemingly out of nowhere. Amazing and wonderful!

Is this inspiration at work? Unlike deductive thinking which follows a logical sequence of steps to a solution, inductive thinking or intuition is a mysterious process. It is the basis of creativity.

Deciding on topics for this blog requires retrieving information accumulated over a lifetime and buried in my memory. I need to relax and let the innate ‘Google’ inside of me find what I am looking for. The ‘light bulb’ will glow once the sunconscious mind is ready.

Intuition and Painting

Inductive thinking is a crucial ingredient of painting. We start with an vast number of options: what to paint and how to paint. We need to decide on topics, composition, medium, style, etc., etc. Our intuition makes some choices.

We start by deductively choosing colours and making marks .

Eventually these ideas are depleted. We pause and take a break while unconsciously thinking about the painting. A few hours or days later we return and see the painting with fresh eyes. This ‘deduce, pause, induce/ inspire’ cycle repeats over and over. The end product is often a surprise and not anything like our initial idea.

Here is a photograph that inspired a painting and the final landscape.

My idea of a productive day, as both a child and an adult, was reading for hours and staring out the window.

Gail Caldwell

Inspiration Thwarted

Here is an interesting story about windows. I once worked at a research laboratory that had a beautiful outlook over the ocean with snow-covered mountains on the horizon.

View of Juan d Fuca Strait and the Olympic Mountains

Strangely, the large windows in every office were high on the wall so you could not see the marvelous view unless you were actually standing at the window.

Research Laboratory with high windows

I was told that the original laboratory manager had the building designed to prevent scientists from wasting time looking out the windows at the view. He must have been a deductive thinker and consequently quelled the creation of countless inspired ideas.

Looking out of windows is not procrastination: it is part of the creative process!

The results of my inductive contemplations will be evident in my future 2023 blog posts.

Exclusive or Inclusive?

The ‘In Crowd’

I have always aspired to be part of the ‘In Crowd’. These are the people with the talent, beauty, or wealth that formed an inner circle of elites. To belong to this exclusive group is the mark of success and status. In high school I was envious of classmates who were more popular, more athletic, more handsome. I wanted what they had. I was unhappy about my inadequacy.

When, in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes,
I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries,
And look upon myself and curse my fate,
Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featured like him, like him with friends possessed,
Desiring this man’s art and that man’s scope,
With what I most enjoy contented least;

Shakespeare, Sonnet 29

As a consequence, I imagined there must be a hierarchy of people based on their talent, beauty or wealth. The beautiful, rich and talented ones were superior to me while all others were in some way inferior. I envied those I judged to be superior and ignored those who were far below. This judgment colours many social situations.

Chasing Success

Society seems to reward achievement. Fame and reward go to those who succeed. Since I was a boy I have had this desire to be better than I am. I had to learn, study, and practice to be better in all aspects of my life.

In my need to succeed, I based my personal worth on performance. My sense of well being was dependent on approval. Instead of accepting that I was not musical or good at baseball, I concluded that I was a flawed person because of my poor skills. Even in activities I was good at, I found people who were better (hence superior) to me.

Much of my adult life I have felt an inadequacy about my capabilities, particularly in art. I still see the hierarchy that defines my place within the art world. I want to be invited into ‘In Crowd’, but often feel on the outside looking in and looking up.

Worthy or Not?

Awareness of my attitude came while attending my son’s grade 2 Christmas concert. As each class performed, I looked at the children. I noticed the kids with the best costume, the best voice, or the prettiest appearance.

Who Do I see?

Then I heard an inner voice say “Look at the children who are unseen”. I started seeing the plain kids, the shy ones, and those I judged to be unattractive. I suddenly felt terrible. Aren’t all children worthy of consideration?

In that moment I saw an ugly truth about my attitude. Those I judged above me deserved my respect. Those below were ignored and unworthy of my attention.

Who is worthy?

Who am I to judge anyone’s worth? Aren’t we all worthy of acceptance and inclusion? Can I be accepted even if I fail to impress? Maybe if I accepted others for their present capabilities, I could feel accepted too.

It’s not only others who I am shunning. I am also shunning parts of me that I consider inferior. Can I bring myself back into wholeness with a more inclusive outlook?

As I get older, the more I stay focused on the acceptance of myself and others, and choose compassion over judgment and curiosity over fear.

Tracee Ellis Ross

Accepting Myself

No wonder my need for achievement was so important. If I failed to perform, I would be unworthy. I would feel shame in the presence of superior artists. My artwork would be judged and dismissed by the serious art world.

Still wanting to join an exclusive club of ‘successful’ artists is misdirected effort. Rather than feeling despondent that I am not a leading artist, or a prestigious award winner or a media favourite, it’s time that I accepted myself for who I am as an artist. Rather than lamenting what I am not, I want to feel that I have a role in the art scene.

I Don’t Want to Belong to Any Club That Will Accept Me as a Member

Groucho Marx

Community

I no longer want the art world to feel like an elitist hierarchy where I feel excluded. I want the art world to be a community of unique creators. I want to embrace the community of artists that I already know. I want to welcome artists who may be unseen and unappreciated.

All artists start as novices. Like the children in the Christmas concert, we are first unseen and unrecognized. Through continuous effort and years of practice we work our way to success and recognition. The journey starts with the sheer love of making marks on paper, doodling or mixing colours. These worthy activities are necessary for something new to arise.

Making marks, splashing colour, doodling, finding sermons in stones, patterns in wood

Accepting Results

Not everyone climbs to the top of the art pyramid. Recognition and reward often lie beyond our control. We need to accept the rewards we are given. That should be perfectly fine. Our self worth is not dependent on achievement. We can be satisfied with the effort we make. The true reward is the journey we take in pursuing our dreams.

The journey between what you once were and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place. –

Barbara De Angelis

Figure Drawing

Body Image

Our figure drawing studio has started after a summer layoff. For 3 hours every Tuesday artists gather to draw an undraped model. The sessions combine my love of drawing and my appreciation of the human body.

Having the opportunity to draw real people is essential for developing a wide artistic repertoire. We draw the human figure in various poses and practise portraiture. Our models are people of all ages, sizes, shapes, and gender (including ‘they’).

Ideal Versus Real

How we view our physical bodies is strongly affected by social media and popular culture. Their focus is on youth, athleticism, and glamour. We feel pressure to emulate fashion models, movie-stars and athletes. We are exhorted to be lean, lithe and muscular. Flawless skin, high cheekbones, wavy hair, and big blue eyes are envied.

Faces and figures in magazines, on social media, and television are Photoshopped idealizations. They are unworldly in comparison to the majority of real people. Reality lies with ordinary faces and bodies which seem plain and imperfect by comparison.

https://www.glamourmagazine.co.uk/article/see-what-men-and-women-think-is-the-perfect-body

Exposure

Our models are real people. They offer a wide variety of bodies and faces to observe, explore and draw. Its one thing to look at our nakedness in privacy. Courage and confidence are required for models to pose in all their magnificence while artists gaze intently and intensely.

Imperfection is Perfection

I am not saying this well. I am not judging the models as being imperfect. While some models are young, many are wrinkled and gray. They are perfect for who they are. My artistic mission is to to portray their essence in an expressive and realistic manner. If I do this well, I will find beauty.

Finding beauty

I appreciate that beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. I sometimes find myself judging the model as attractive (from an artistic perspective) or not so desirable. When I focus on drawing what I see, I discover there is beauty to be revealed. It could be in the shapes, the repose, the action or the mood. Its a wonderful transformation and one of the reasons life drawing is so rewarding.

Accepting Myself

I am reassured by our models that bodies at all ages, in all shapes and in all enthnicities are beautiful. Our variations enhance our personality and individuality. It would be a shame if we stopped liking our bodies after middle age.

Drawing real people has helped me in this lifelong quest to love my own face and body. Can I accept my own physical peculiarities- such as my slanted eyes, baldness, and knobby knees? I don’t need to be perfect. I too am beautiful in my own unique way.

Wanting More

Because drawing is fun and endlessly rewarding, I want more. I want to improve and to experiment. In my next post I will examine mark making and how a few lines and strokes can create a beautiful figure.

Published
Categorized as Art

Tribute

Vincent

Church at Auvers

The “Beyond Van Gogh” exhibit (https://vangoghhalifax.com/) is new multi-media performance bringing a famous artist’s work to world-wide audiences. The show came to Halifax. I have seen original paintings by Vincent Van Gogh. I was amazed by the intensity of his paintings and their emotional impact.

Beyond Van Gogh

‘Beyond Van Gogh’ exceeded all my expectations and generated a visceral reaction. I was awestruck by the quality and quantitiy of Van Gogh’s paintings. I also applaud the artists/ technicians who created the multi-media presentation. The imagery, animation, quotations, choreography and music created an immersive story of complete fascination and absorption.

The quoted excerpts from Vincent’s letters to his brother Theo were deeply moving to read. His humility and sincerity contrast to the values of today’s society. Ego, competitiveness, outragiousness for publicity, and arrogance have little presence in Vincent.

I left the exhibit with great reluctance and wondered about a good souvenir. I could buy a T shirt, or a mug with a starry night or sunflowers.

Maybe imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. I made a self portrait based on a selfie that I took at the show, with Vincent as inspiration.

Legacy

Vincent Van Gogh’s life could not have been easy. He struggled to find meaning and purpose in his pursuits. He faced failure many times, but carried on.

Perhaps by today’s standards we would judge him to be a loser. He didn’t sell any paintings, he was not wealthy, and he held little status.

Despite all this, or because of this, he created an amazing repertoire of art. We can tell from his paintings that he loved doing what he was doing.

His story shows me that it’s not what you get in life that is important. It’s what you make from what you are given.

I asked God for strength, that I might achieve;
I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey.

I asked for riches, that I might be happy;
I was given poverty, that I might be wise.
I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men;
I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God.
I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life;
I was given life, that I might enjoy all things.
I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for.
...

attributed to an unknown soldier in the American Civil War

,http://sites.rootsweb.com/~allawren/military/confedprayer.htm

In the end he did find beauty in the simplest of things. He showed us what really counts is not how many paintings we sell, or how many patrons we can find. What counts for the artist is the satisfaction from the process of making art.

For my birthday my wife gave me an illustrated book of Vincent’s letters. It will keep me inspired.

Refreshment

Tired Eyes

A few posts ago I commented on the wealth on imagery that is available for us in today’s world. Spectacular images can to found on the internet, on TV, in magazines and in books.

Moreover we are bombarded by commercials to exhort us to buy things. Often these are beautiful things- stylish cars, elegant fashion, beauty products and exotic travel. We have magazines full of stunning photo shoots of fashion models promoting fashion hair, makeup and glamour. It becomes repetitive and boring.

https://www.discountmags.ca/magazine/british-vogue-august-1-2021-digital

In my daily routine I live in a comfortable home with a landscaped yard in a neighbourhood with scenic greenbelts and parks. I am so familiar with these places that I can be inured to their beauty and lose interest.

I feel like I am at a fabulous ‘all you can eat’ visual buffet, but I am completely satiated by the deluge. I have lost my appetite.

Repetitive Ennui

WIth overabundance and familiarity, images become repetitive and boring.

The visual brain/ memory connection can instantaneously recognize a familiar scene. Based on the need to quickly process threats or safety, our brain unconsciously dismisses an image as familiar and not worth engaging further.

As an artist, I need to be intrigued by what I see. I need to refresh my eyes. If I am not engaged with what I see and create, how can I interest a viewer? It’s my business to create intriguing images.

Mess Up, Mash Up

To reactivate my sight senses I sometimes create fun new images from by collage. Here are a few examples.

I took pictures from old magazines or calendars and used scissors and glue to rearrange the cuttings. This an iconic Lawren Harris painting that I cut into strips and recomposed.The collage engages the viewer to try unscramble the scene.

Magazines are full of beautiful images that we usually glance at an move on. I reconfigured these photos to engage my mind to interpret the mixture of familar and unfamiliar components. Our brains need some ambiguity to be engaged.

Pattern Recognition

Here is a photo of a rhododendron from my garden that is a common scene at this time of year.

I used a photo editor on my tablet to re- colour the photo into something more painterly. Our brains love to see patterns, especially patterns containing a degree of randomness or disruption.

Ambiguity

I think an essential aspect of painting is to keep the eye and the mind engaged. It’s not so easy to do when we live in a world that is over-saturated with imagery.

This drawing may be simple, but there is enough ambiguity to be somewhat intriguing, which makes it interesting.